Sunny Sanskari Ki Tulsi Kumari

What are the items you would look for in a new Shashank Khaitan film? Let’s tick them off.

A story like a ray of sunshine: X

If only Khaitan and company had a plot as long as their title, there might’ve been a smidgeon of a story out there. But Sunny Sanskari (Varun Dhawan) and Tulsi Kumari (Janhvi Kapoor) teaming up and self-inviting themselves to the wedding of their respective former lovers is about as garden fresh as a joint family in a Barjatya movie.

Once upon a time, Varun Dhawan was an interesting actor. He experimented with promise and, later, when his choices became conventional — leaning mostly on playing a man-child oblivious to the ways of the world till told otherwise by his female counterpart — the actor managed to inject intrigue in repetition. Once upon a time, his performance was a crossbreed of the 90s’ excess and modern alertness, evoking more nostalgia than awe. Today he is unable to not just diversify but even essay the same roles with conviction; this devolution, and not lack of evolution, is a thing of wonder.

Like most critics, I jot down notes while watching a movie. These notes are mostly factual reminders: character names, periods, places, plot details, specific scenes, lyrics, credits. When the movie is fine, these notes contain observations: thoughts about shots, metaphors, social pointers, puns, easter eggs and scene breakdowns. When the movie bombs, the notes become adjectives and verbal emojis: so bad, oh my god, worst, REALLY, what is he doing, come on, absolutely not. But when the movie is Sunny Sanskari Ki Tulsi Kumari, the notes look unhinged. For example, I see a note yelling: “Where is the damn leopard?”. There’s another note begging: “But why?”. Another: “Chutney or smoothie?” Another: “Eco-conscious writing, much recycling”. No context. Just madness. If I were to draw a mental map of how I arrived at a stage of waiting for a leopard cameo, the map would be an illustrated review. And I’d be an artist.

Out of Karan Johar’s young proteges, I find Shashank Khaitan’s voice the most influential in taking the Kuch Kuch Hota Hai conversation forward. Film after film, he creates the portrait of the young upper-middle-class Punjabi/ Marwari youth caught between the values inherited from the family and what the Internet defines as modern.